*--- you just see right through me

[cassandra vasquez]

--- It was a well known fact to those who know Cassandra Vasquez, that she was a work first, play later kind of girl. As energetic and random as she may be, she knew that certain things had to be done before she could go gallivanting around. A lot of people her age didn't understand this trait. They much rather play first and leave the work until the last minute. To Cassie this always seemed like the wrong thing to do. Who wanted to come home after a day of fun to piles of work? It certainly put a person in a worse mood, after all. No, she simply liked to get the bad things out of the way before moving on to the good. Which was why, when she'd woken up that day to a list of chores, she got right on them. Miss Vasquez had never had a team of maids or servants. Having come from a family with limited means, she didn't expect to any time soon. No, Cassie wasn't rich. And she never had been. She was used to having to have her own job if she wanted fancy clothes or a cell phone. While her family wasn't poor, she did feel the affects of not having endless bunches of money. There were a lot of people in Paris who were rich and it was hard not to envy them. Sometimes she was even jealous. But one thing she learned from her experience was that she shouldn't take anything for granted. And she really didn't. She valued everything she had. And everyone.

--- Cassie had a close circle of friends and loved ones. She had never been the type to have five best friends and six boyfriends. For one, she was afraid to let that many people in, and for another, she'd been stuck on one boy in particular for quite some time. It was funny how easily her thoughts strayed to him. She tried to push them away, but she had lost control of them a long time ago. Jude Andrews was one of her best friends. If not her best friend. He always seemed to be there. No matter what. But he was in love with someone else. Someone that Cassie had once considered a best friend. Savanna Cyers was one of the first people that Cassie had come to know in Paris. For the longest time, they'd been inseparable. But then Jude had come along and stolen both of their hearts. Unfortunately for Cassie, Savanna had been the one to catch his eye. To say that she was angry was only part of it. She'd felt betrayed as well. Savanna had known Cassie's feelings for Jude, but had ended up dating him anyway. While Cassie was left with no one. For the longest time she was forced to sit on the side line and watch their relationship unfurl and grow stronger by the day. They were completely in love with each other. It had been so blatantly obvious. And Cassie had hated everything about it.

--- But this was when Savanna disappeared into the darkness of the night. If she had still been friends with her, she would have realized how very similar it was to her father disappearing all those years ago. But the circumstances this time were incredibly different. Ever since Savanna and Jude had started dating, Cassie had secretly wished the girl would vanish. She hadn't expected it to actually happen, though. And when it did, it had only made Cassie even angrier at her. She remembered the way Jude had taken it. The utter heartbreak in his eyes was almost too much. He'd been left completely broken but Cassie was there to pick up the pieces. She became his shoulder to cry on of sorts. Whenever he needed her, she made sure she was there. It was safe to say that she was still completely in love with him. It was what fueled her need to make him better. Because she couldn't stand seeing him like that. It tore at her heart, and she could feel some of the pain he was going through. One thing she swore to herself was that she would never leave him. Not like that. And she stayed true to her word. Of course, she'd never had any reason to leave, and so far as she knew, Savanna hadn't had a reason either. It didn't help that she hadn't even bothered to explain why she'd left. Maybe then Jude wouldn't have been hurt so badly. But there was nothing that the young girl could do about it.

--- Over time, Cassie and Jude became closer and closer. To the point where if you didn't know them, you would think that they were dating. But they weren't. Much to Cassie's frustration, Jude never quite seemed to be over Savanna. And he never quite seemed to notice Cassie standing there right in front of him. To him, she was merely a friend. Someone he could call up on a whim and would agree to go anywhere with him. She didn't think he knew, but the brunette would do anything for him, be anything for him. If he told her to jump, she would ask how high. She was so wrapped around his finger that it was rather pathetic. And just when it seemed Jude was finally starting to get over his heartache. Just when everyone was moving on, Savanna came back. Cassie hadn't known what had given her the right to come back. How dare she show her face again after what she'd done? Cassie had finally seemed to clean up all of the wreckage that she left, but here she was, to spew it all over again. It was easy to say that the young girl was not a happy camper. She could only imagine what Savanna's return would do to Jude. He'd been so devastated by Savanna's departure that he would surely not be able to handle her coming back. At least, not as well as she knew he'd want to.

--- Even after Cassie had talked to Savanna and found out why she'd left, she couldn't help but still be angry. Not so much at Savanna as she originally had been, but at the situation. People were still going to be hurt when all was said and done, and Cassie only hoped that she'd be able to clean up the mess once again. But then there was the question of her own emotional pain. She'd never let on how much all of this had affected her. Even before Savanna had left. She'd been completely miserable watching the budding romance of a boy she loved and a girl she'd once called her best friend. And then after she was gone, it had been torture to watch what Jude had gone through. But Cassie was a born actress. She knew how to hide her negative feelings. And so she had. Somehow, she'd managed to be the solid rock. It was a wonder she never faltered. Well, not never. Jude wasn't her only friend. She'd been known to rant to one other person. And he was someone she knew wouldn't go around telling her secrets. Still, Cassie was torn. She wanted to tell Jude the way she felt about him, even though she knew he didn't quite feel the same for her. And she'd been working up the courage before Savanna had come back. But now that she was back, Cassie didn't think she'd ever be able to say the truth.

--- And then there was the horrible possibility that now that Savanna was back, Jude would fall right back into her, just like old times. And where would that leave Cassie? Was she merely to sit on the sidelines once again? Would she be forced to endure it all over? The girl wanted anything but to be the third wheel another time. It was hard enough the first time. But now, after all that had happened, she didn't think she could do it. And she didn't want to lose Jude's friendship. She liked the way things were between them. Even if they weren't everything she could have hoped for. She saw him every day, they knew each other like they knew the back of their hands. And she didn't want to go back to being the second most important girl in his life. She liked being the one person he talked to when he needed advice. She liked it that she was the first one that he called to hang out. And if Jude and Savanna ended up back together, she would no longer be that girl. She would once again be inferior. What would she do then? She couldn't help the way she felt about Jude. Maybe if she could stop loving him, she would. It would certainly be less painful that way. But she couldn't. So there was no point in wishing she could.

--- At the moment, Cassie was trying her hardest to avoid these depressing thoughts. Her chores went by easy enough, and when she was finally finished, she decided to have some quality time on the computer. Grabbing a bottle of water from the kitchen first, she plopped down in the computer chair and fired it up. When she signed on instant messenger, an involuntary smile graced her lips when she looked at the online list. She'd been hoping he would be on. Before she had a chance to send him an im, he sent her one first. Her smile faded at the question on her screen. So, he knew she was back in town, huh? She'd been afraid of this moment. As she'd thought he would be, he seemed distraught over it. A pang of anger welled up in her and she tried to push it back down. She was practicing not hating Savanna anymore, even though it was hard at times like this. Their conversation quickly turned into one like they had most days and she was grateful for it. It almost felt as if savanna wasn't back. Almost. It wasn't too long before he was asking her to come over and she agreed whole-heartedly. When didn't she want to be at his house? It was like her second home. Signing off with the promise that she would be there in a few minutes, she raced back into her room to prep.

--- Cassie was far from vain, and she didn't need eighty pounds of make up to feel satisfied, but she did have to look in the mirror and play with her hair before she was satisfied enough to leave. It was Jude she was going to see, after all. She couldn't very well be looking ugly when she saw him. Hopping in her car, she quickly made her way to Jude's house. It was in the same place it had always been, and this was a path Cassie could trek in her sleep. She arrived, parking in her usual spot in the driveway and merrily jumping out of her car once again. She hummed a tune under her breath as she walked up to the door. Having grown accustomed to being here, she simply opened the door and let herself in. No one cared, she was here so often that her sudden appearance was never a surprise. "Juuuuuuude!" She called his name, wondering where he was. He was more than likely in his room, but she didn't feel like climbing the stairs. Instead she headed for the living room and plopped down on the couch. "Jude, I'm going to run up your phone bill, okay?" She called once again. She was only joking, but she figured it would get him in the living room a little bit faster.

Status , finished
Tagged , jude andrews
Words , twenty twenty-nine
Outfit , just invisible
Notes , i honestly have no idea how i achieved this. i am astounded.